


Stupid

by GreenNebulae



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Batman - Fandom
Genre: Drabble, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-10
Updated: 2020-05-10
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:53:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24116824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreenNebulae/pseuds/GreenNebulae
Summary: Selina breaks into Wayne manor and discovers his secret. She's less than impressed.“I’m disappointed in you,” she finally says. He’s silent, but she’s not surprised. In all the ways that Bruce Wayne is loud and flashy, Batman is quite and hidden. “Not that you’re Batman.” She clarifies, “but that you’re stupid.”
Comments: 1
Kudos: 13





	Stupid

She sits on the windowsill, musing about her years at Catwoman, as the cool breeze wafts into the room. She drags her finger across the sharp steel in her hand, and shifts ever so slightly. The man sleeping in the bed is none other than Bruce Wayne. Before tonight, she hadn’t known too much about him, not much more than the tabloids spread. Now she knows a lot more. Bruce Wayne’s security is crazy. She knows he’s rich, but she’s broken into the pentagon with less fuss. Still, she’s not one to resist a challenge and so she searched and searched, looking for the most hidden treasure to sell. Bruce would fuss and scream, but the money would do more good in her hands than on his vanity. He’d given millions to charity, sure. He seemed better than his peers on the outside. But a million here or there wasn’t enough, not when he’s sitting on more money than his family could spend in a hundred generations. Not when that money was taken from them in the first place.

“Are you here to rob me?” She looks up to see he’s awake and staring at her in fear. “I-I have money, please don’t hurt me.” She’d think he was as vapid as he’d want her too if she didn’t know better.  
“I was.” She confesses, her eyes trace over his figure and the pieces cement herself in her mind. “Figured you’d have a lot of priceless jewelry sitting around.” She was going to take all of it, save the string of pearls the young boy clutched to his chest as a memory of his mother, she would have left that.  
“Oh, uh, well, uh, what changed?” He’s sputtering, and he’s quite good.  
“Everything,” she answers, quite cryptically. Still, he’d appreciate that. She stands, gracefully jumps down into his bedroom with the moon at her back, as tosses the Batarang in her hands onto the bed between them. He’s silent, but now it feels different, less acting and more natural.  
“You had a lot of security in place, took me hours.” She purrs in the tone reserved for his counterpart. There is no real outward change in the man, maybe just in the steel in his eyes, but she knows.  
“The expensive stuff is out in the open.” He says.  
“You know I can’t resist a challenge.” She counters. She purrs as she moves closer to the bed.  
“Enough, Selina.” He growls, as if she needed more confirmation. They stare at each other for a second before she sighs.

“I’m disappointed in you,” she finally says. He’s silent, but she’s not surprised. In all the ways that Bruce Wayne is loud and flashy, Batman is quite and hidden. “Not that you’re Batman.” She clarifies, “but that you’re stupid.” He stiffens but she doesn’t care, because doesn’t he see? While she climbs into billionaires’ bedrooms in old leather and a $90 whip he is flying around in million dollar planes and how much is that car and he is so stupid. Ivy wanted a green deal that would have cost less than 100 million and Dr. Fries work to save his wife might be another 50 and who knows what Penguin wants but it’s so simple. Bruce Wayne could have defeated Batman’s enemies before they started.  
“Stupid.” He repeats. Even tone and flat delivery, it’s hard to tell that it’s even a question.  
“Yeah, stupid.” She repeats. “Seriously.”


End file.
